Monthly Archives: April 2015

When you want to say yes

I said no to something this week I really wanted to say yes to. Worse than that, it’s something I initially thought I could do then had to bow out. I hate that. I hate disappointing people. Ever been there?

If I’m not careful, I can start to believe my identity rests in what others think of me. I’m a people pleaser. And that’s ok. I like being nice. It’s how I’m made. But I need to remember that this quality comes from God and that my identity comes from him, as well. So as much as I regret disappointing a friend, she’d even agree that not following a prompting from the father would be an even greater disappointment.

That prompting is to breathe. To rest and wait. To let him pick the opportunity. That’s my word this year. Opportunity. And I’m a doer. So I just started saying yes to everything. That was my response. But if I’m not saying yes to the right things then I’m still in disobedience.

My verse I’m meditating on this year is 2 Corinthians 13:11.


I think it’s the maturity part he’s working on right now. And I’m trying to be joyful about it. It’s not always easy.

Anyone else need to do the hard thing? Take a deep breath and say no to something?

I encourage you. We’re in this together.

Fear & Flying

My daughter loves to swing. Like, loves it. Doesn’t care about baby dolls or bicycles. She just wants to swing. Look at that joy!


She’ll swing for as long as you’ll let her. And as high as she possibly can. Holy moly.


And it terrifies me. I watch her go up, up, up, higher and higher, and an Oscar-caliber disaster film plays in my head. She loses her grip, tumbles backwards, and breaks her neck. That is, if she even survives. I imagine ambulances and lots of blood. I’m telling you, it’s scary stuff.

It takes all of my willpower to not tell her to slow down, stay lower. I avert my eyes each time I’m about to say “be careful”. I can’t even watch. I am filled with fear.

She’s not. She’s free and having fun. She’s not unaware. We’ve talked about safety and she understands the risk, but she doesn’t let it hold her back. How beautiful is that. She’s embraced the adventure. And that’s who I want her to be. I want her to take risks and chase dreams, be smart and use her brains to accomplish big things. Like touching the top of a tree. Like serving in a foreign land. Like being a good friend. But I also want her safe and protected and whole. She’s my child. There’s such tension there. Being a parent isn’t for sissies.

But I have to remember she’s God’s child more. If I’m going to witness her bloom into her amazing potential, then I need to trust in his mighty protection.

“He is my loving ally and my fortress, my tower of safety, my rescuer. He is my shield, and I take refuge in him.” ‭Psalms‬ ‭144‬:‭2‬ NLT

She won’t be the amazing woman she can be if I’m always telling her to play it safe. So for her sake, and mine, I have to get over my fear and let her fly.

If you want to fly high, my baby girl has a tip for you.

“Close your eyes!”

Sometimes you just have to close your eyes and jump.

First things first

Raise your hand if you love your smartphone. ME! ME! ME! I even wrote an ode to my phone once. Because it’s more than just a phone, right? In addition to using it as my camera, calculator, TV screen, internet searcher, grocery list keeper, calendar, and more, it’s also my alarm. So it is literally the first thing I reach for in the morning.  And it would be so easy to get sucked into email, Instagram, Facebook, Yahoo News Digest (you should download that if you don’t have it) , etc., first thing. To keep from going down that rabbit hole I’ve made a deal with myself. I’m not allowed to open any other app until I open the bible app. This is an unbreakable vow. So that is what I do first.

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The bible app has a verse of the day and that’s where I’ll begin. I do more, I study more, I read more, but first thing it’s that verse of the day. And oh, I can’t tell you how many times it’s spoken right to my heart. Like this morning.

It’s been a rough week with work stuff, family stuff, stuff stuff.  So I woke up dreading the day. Just feeling tired and worn and grumpy. But my alarm doesn’t know that so it goes off just like it’s any other day. Stupid alarm. I drag myself out of bed, just wishing I could crawl right back in. I know you’ve been there. But, responsibilities. More stuff. So I’m up and I have that deal with myself. I open the app and I read…

“Don’t copy the behavior and the customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” Romans 12:2 NLT

And that gets me to thinking about my ladies. I lead a life group (small group, bible study, home group, whatever you want to call it) and right now we’re telling each other our stories. We’re laying it all out and getting raw and real. And it’s beautiful. I’m so grateful for the trust we have in each other to be confidently vulnerable. I see the unique way God has transformed their lives. They are his and wonderful and perfect. And so with a single verse, my thoughts went from dark and morose to grateful, honoring and joyful. And my whole perspective was changed. “Let God transform  you… by changing the way you think.” Thank you, Jesus. Thank you bible app. I love technology.

If you don’t have the bible app, get it now. It’s free! And it’s even better than Yahoo News.